The Answers In Between - Dry Chicken Lyrics

I was starving myself
Punishment for something that wasn't my decision
I was forcing myself
To scarf down dry prepared chicken
I wasn't eating i was grieving
Lost the spirit lost the feeling I know
It wasn't helping but I've been dealing
I've been dealing
I was on the bridge to campus
I was alone in a Florida pool
I won't say what I was thinking of doing
I'm mostly glad I didn't go through
I tried hard to move
But breathing in and out took most of my effort
I had so much to do
But standing up was taking forever
I'm not a fighter
I'm not cut out for a war
I'm not a fighter
But I've been here before
I'm too fragile
I should man up some more
But I've been here before
I was on the bridge to campus
I was alone in a Florida pool
I won't say what I was thinking of doing
I'm still glad I didn't go through
When I left my meds on a Greyhound
When I yelled at my brother at school
I don't know where this is going
But I feel cursed to see it through
The water couldn't drown me and the traffic stopped around me so I'm not going anywhere
If I can help it
I just walk into my friends shows knowing this could all go (in the back of my head) if someone said that would protect them
I believed that this ground was made for us for me to walk upon
But I know how this ground was built and what it was built on
I always heard that It Gets Better but those days were lower stakes
It got better it just got harder so I carry a little more weight
I was on the bridge to campus
I was alone in a Florida pool
I won't say what I was thinking of doing
I'm mostly glad I didn't go through
If my past self knew what would happen
They'd think I chose to be the fool
The pros barely outweigh it
But I feel cursed to see it through
I think I had it
I think I've had it before
I'm not a warrior
I'll be marked safe in the war
I have to bear it
I have to swear that I'm fine
I'm not the only one
That just wants to survive